Marriage is Forever

They had just graduated from college when our oldest grandson married his lovely bride in a very touching ceremony before family and friends. Three years later, upon completing her college degree, our oldest granddaughter and her husband were married in a beautiful ceremony in their college town in Texas. Fast forward three more years to last Sunday evening when our second oldest granddaughter, after graduating from the U of A the week before, married her best friend and the love of her life, in beautiful Thorncrown Chapel, with his dad officiating at the ceremony. There where their lives first intertwined almost 22 years ago.

When John and I married, he was a mature twenty-three and I was only eighteen. I am SO thankful for his maturity and patience in dealing with me those first few months. God tells us in His word that we should develop patience.

“May God who gives patience, steadiness, and encouragement help you to live in complete harmony with each other—each with the attitude of Christ toward the other.” Romans 15:5 TLB

 As one who has been married for almost 56 years, I can tell you that patience,steadiness and encouragement are three things that will help develop a good marriage. Patience with my burned biscuits and encouragement that my cooking would only get better with time was important to me.

 I remember one time in particular, I was in a hurry to make a cream pie. I had made a lot of apple pies and raisin pies before I married. For some reason, I don’t recall making a cream pie. John loved cocoanut pies so I was determined to make one. I rolled out the crust I had made from scratch; got it in the pie plate in one piece. I stirred the cream filling determined not to burn it on the bottom. I poured it into the pie shell and proceeded to make the meringue. I carefully spread that on top of the pie and placed it in the oven to brown. Upon taking the pie out of the oven, I discovered the crust wasn’t done. What had I done wrong? I called my mother crying,

“Mother, I just made this cream pie and baked it (sniff, sniff) and when I took it out of the oven, the crust wasn’t done.” By now, I was bawling. She told me that crust had to be baked before pouring in the filling. My poor husband ate that pie without complaining and I’m sure praying all along that my baking would improve.

 I’m thankful that my mother was close by and I could call her when I was in the depths of despair about my poor pie. However, God tells couples that upon marriage, they should depend on their mate and not on their parents. It’s that “leave and cleave” situation but more on that perhaps at another time. The main thing I think newlyweds must learn and “olderweds” need to ask themselves is : "Am I going to focus on what I get or what I give?" If we can exhibit agape love, the selfless, sacrificial, unconditional love, our marriages will certainly have a much better chance of succeeding.

“Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.” 1 Corinthians 13:4-6 ESV